Beet and Pear Salad Remixed

I saw a recipe on FB for a Pear and Beet Salad. I sent my husband out with a shopping list but my ass forgot to add a pear to the list. For some reason pears aren’t up on my list of things that I have around the house. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out why. It’s simple! It’s a fucking piece of fruit. For years my existence has relied on Mountain Dew and Nicotine as my primary food groups.

Needless to say, I substituted an apple in its place along with a bunch of other items. I used pecans (cause I don’t like nuts…no pun Intended) and green peppers. I got this recipe off of a vegan site and the recipe called for honey. I thought that honey was on the no no list but depending on which website you go to I guess there’s a debate on using honey. Since I had to choose a side, I said fuck it and chose to use the honey. If i fucked up…my bad. I’m sure one of the vegan experts will correct me later. Moving on…

So let’s get to the real shit…the taste.

I remembered that I fucking like beets. As a matter of fact, I didn’t want the rest of the rabbit food. I just wanted the beets. The beets were sweet. I fucking love sugar. I guess the good thing is that the beet offered a better sweetness than me eating a shit load of donuts or cake. My waist will thank me.

Overall the salad was pretty good. Apple and beet on the same fork. Yum! Fuck yeah, I can definitely eat it again. I had to baked potatoes with my salad and I saw a video where they rubbed the potato with olive oil and kosher salt before baking. I followed suit and the skin came out crispy with a hint of salt. I wasn’t childish today! I ate the whole fucking thing. The skin was the best damn part of the potato. As for the pecans, well let’s just say, you all can keep that shit unless it’s wrapped up in some fucking chocolate.

Unfortunately, I forgot to take a picture before I stirred it up on my plate. But you get the fucking point.

I’m having surgery today to remove a tumor from my jawline. I probably won’t be able to eat shit for a couple of days. But we will see.

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