Carve

Have you ever just looked around at this big world and ever wondered where do you really fit in? Fitting in can be a daunting task. We say we don’t care what other people think about us. Yet we do. We say that we love the way we look but yet we peer into the mirror wondering is it good enough? Is it cute enough? Will someone say something about me?

The older I get, I am truly embracing me. I don’t care what people think of me. I don’t care what people say about me. I’m a little plump…I got the whole saggy boob thing going on. I even have the squishy butt that’s heading in the same direction as my boobs. Yet still I say FUCK IT. Who has more swag than me?

I’m carving out my own image. My own mind set. My own individuality! I’m playing by my own rules. Today I am eating meat. Tomorrow, I will be a vegan all day. The day after, I will be whatever the fuck I want. That’s the lovely thing about life it changes daily. It changes by the minute. It changes by the second.

Carve out your place in life. Be great! Do you! Be happy! Be helpful! Be kind. Fuck it! Be mean if that’s what makes you happy! Just carve out you!

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/carve/

 

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Wild Rice Vegetable Soup

I’m trying to expand my palate and make veggies sexy again. LOL! I know. Nothing like a corny ass joke to try to buy time before I express how I really feel.

The soup…second attempt to make a healthy conscious soup that may stick to my bones.

This shit wasn’t it! At least not for me! Wild rice is up on that list with Brussels sprouts. The soup was OK. I would make it again without the wild rice. The recipe called for squash, cannelloni beans, celery, bay leaves, onion, and vegetable stock all in the crock pot. Six hours later…the vegetables were still fucking hard so I left it cooking. 10 hours later…soup! Wild rice and all!

Now out of all people in my damn house, I expected to be in love with the soup and to be the only one to like it. I didn’t expect my husband to like the soup. So…I guess since he liked it I might make it again but maybe with some brown rice.

The final product.

The kale is added last and I added some fresh cracked pepper.

Vegan Black Pepper Tofu

Shocker alert. I have never had tofu before. Never ever!!! So…well…I mean! Well damn! I should just spit it out.

The Vegan Black Pepper Tofu was FIRE! That shit was good.

I was skeptical when I took the tofu out of the package. I wasn’t especially happy about pressing it to take the water out. Feeling the tofu was fucking strange because the texture felt weird. I’m just glad that it didn’t have a smell or this shit would have been dead from the very beginning.

Needless to say, we had another day with eggplant on the menu. Today’s eggplant was pan seared and with the soy sauce concoction that I made gave the eggplant an awesome taste. I can honestly say, I can fuck with eggplant this way versus the eggplant Parmesan that I made yesterday.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I give this dish a 8.5. If all vegan dishes taste this damn good then I’m totally looking forward to my new lifestyle.

I forgot to take a picture of the food on my plate because I fucked it up real quick. But I did capture the prep.

Browning the tofu…

Browned the mushrooms and eggplant…

All together now…

Shit was good…until next time!!!

Vegan Chick Pea Gyros Who Knew…

Vegan Chick Pea Gyros. OMG!!! Amazing. Very delicious dish. I had to rearrange the flavor profile to add a little of me but shit I could eat these all day. Too bad I just come back from the dentist and my mouth was still numb. I had a hard time keeping my food in my damn mouth. (If One of my kids snuck a pic, someone would have thought I needed a damn baby bib) But the shit was so good that I didn’t give a damn that I kept biting the fuck out my tongue.

Roasted chick peas were the meat substitute. Who the fuck thought of this idea? Shit was on fire with spice but it was off the fucking chain.

Today’s side dish brought to you by the letter C as in cauliflower bitches. Okay. I’m being silly. I hate cauliflower or do I? I made barbecue cauliflower. These mofo’s were great. Changed my mind about fucking cauliflower. Shit was delish! Any who! I posted some pictures. If you want the recipe then you gotta post a comment.

On a side note, cause I just HAD to share…I got rejected from a vegan group on FB. Can you believe that shit? They had a questionnaire. Guess my ass was a little to real when I said…”I love fucking meat…it just doesn’t love me.”

Fuck, I’m thinking about some bacon right now. PIG bacon! Not that fake shit! I digress! Here’s the pic.

Nest

Have you ever seen Big Bird’s nest on Sesame Street? It’s probably been a while especially when it’s not shown very often. Big Bird of course has this massive sized nest, as he should since he is of course, Big Bird. I find myself comparing my nest to Big Bird’s. I mean, for a while my nest was pretty big. All four of my baby birds and Papa bird fit into the nest quite nicely. We had room to grow and grow is exactly what they did. GROW! And they grew some more and now they don’t fit into the nest like they used too.

Now, I spend a lot of my time perched up in my nest, spending a lot of time alone with my thoughts. It’s funny, as they get older, so do I. I have to face my own mortality, the baby birds having birds of their own, finding jobs and flying away. For a while I felt sad but then quickly felt refreshed because I remembered what Papa Bird said about that empty nest.

An empty nest means freedom. Free to fly to Vegas. Free to fly here or there. Fly anywhere! Sex here. Sex there. Booze in the morning if I want. Booze at night if I like.

Just freedom! The empty nest isn’t looking so bad anymore.

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/nest/

Trifling Ass Bitch

There are just some people that should get the Trifling Ass Bitch Award. Here’s a few examples:

The can I bum a smoke guy! Bastard never has his own pack of smokes but smokes the fuck out of yours.

The take someone else’s lunch fuck head. You know you didn’t pack a lunch…shit head. I just want to make a peanut butter and laxative sandwich special just for you.

Then there’s the over excited I don’t fucking need any more coffee guy…you know the one…spills the coffee as he pours, misses the entire coffee cup pouring in sugar, spilled the fucking cream, and of course the coffee ring…all left on the counter as he WALKS THE FUCK AWAY. I hope you burn your fucking soul…douche.

The guy who leaves every single takeout container in the fridge for at least six months. Then they ostentatiously ask…who the hell threw my food out? I guess everyone should watch the penicillin grow too. Fucker!

Or my favorite, take a shit at work guy!! Have you ever heard of a fucking courtesy flush you nasty bitch. Better yet, stay on the floor you work on and do that nasty shit down there.

Ok. My short list of people I who annoy the hell out of me and are most deserving of the Trifling Ass Award.

Oh wait! There’s one more. The ultimate ultimate, there’s the sunflower seed guy. This is the most trifling fuck of all. Sunflower seeds everywhere…on the desk, floor, and worst of all…in the trash can. But you were too fucking lazy to put a trash bag in the fucking can. Complete and utter nastiness. Something about human body fluids being spread all around for others to touch…fucking nasty.

Trifling Ass Bitch…

To be continued….

My Dixie

I had Dixie for 11 years. We had a lot of cuddles, a lot of eating, and many prison breaks that resulted in me chasing you around the neighborhood in my car. You’ve traveled to many places and you left pounds and pounds of white hair every where. You especially liked staying at the Hyatt. You snored the loudest in their comfortable beds. 5 Star accommodations for a 5 Star friend. We survived 10 vacuums, a few remotes, and plenty of great times. Above all, you were my eyes and ears when Junior was getting into stuff. He didn’t mind you laying on him as a pillow or stepping on him while he was sleep. There’s always room in the tent for you. I will miss you sooooo much my love. You were more than just a dog.