Beet and Pear Salad Remixed

I saw a recipe on FB for a Pear and Beet Salad. I sent my husband out with a shopping list but my ass forgot to add a pear to the list. For some reason pears aren’t up on my list of things that I have around the house. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out why. It’s simple! It’s a fucking piece of fruit. For years my existence has relied on Mountain Dew and Nicotine as my primary food groups.

Needless to say, I substituted an apple in its place along with a bunch of other items. I used pecans (cause I don’t like nuts…no pun Intended) and green peppers. I got this recipe off of a vegan site and the recipe called for honey. I thought that honey was on the no no list but depending on which website you go to I guess there’s a debate on using honey. Since I had to choose a side, I said fuck it and chose to use the honey. If i fucked up…my bad. I’m sure one of the vegan experts will correct me later. Moving on…

So let’s get to the real shit…the taste.

I remembered that I fucking like beets. As a matter of fact, I didn’t want the rest of the rabbit food. I just wanted the beets. The beets were sweet. I fucking love sugar. I guess the good thing is that the beet offered a better sweetness than me eating a shit load of donuts or cake. My waist will thank me.

Overall the salad was pretty good. Apple and beet on the same fork. Yum! Fuck yeah, I can definitely eat it again. I had to baked potatoes with my salad and I saw a video where they rubbed the potato with olive oil and kosher salt before baking. I followed suit and the skin came out crispy with a hint of salt. I wasn’t childish today! I ate the whole fucking thing. The skin was the best damn part of the potato. As for the pecans, well let’s just say, you all can keep that shit unless it’s wrapped up in some fucking chocolate.

Unfortunately, I forgot to take a picture before I stirred it up on my plate. But you get the fucking point.

I’m having surgery today to remove a tumor from my jawline. I probably won’t be able to eat shit for a couple of days. But we will see.

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Beefless Ground

I’m still working it out on this journey of veganism. I still feel like these pre-made foods aren’t really hitting but part of this journey is the experimentation.

I originally tried the LightLife Smart Crumble in a breakfast burrito and I couldn’t fuck with the after taste in my mouth. Mountain Dew couldn’t even wash the taste out.

However! I need to eat! So…

I tried the Gardein beefless ground. I was skeptical and not really trying to get my hopes up. I decided that I wasn’t going to fuck up an entire dish trying this shit so I decided to make some rice and the crumble and have that for breakfast.

I added a little paprika and cayenne pepper and warmed on the stove.

Needless to say. I can definitely fuck with the Gardein Beefless Ground. The shit was good. I think I have found my new go to product.

Can you say Whew! I was starting to feel some kind of way. This new journey is going to be a fucking crazy journey. I have a lot of shitty bad habits. But my outlook is one fucking day at a time.

I even got my husband to substitute his breakfast meat this morning. Fuck yeah! One day at a time. Baby steps.

Carve

Have you ever just looked around at this big world and ever wondered where do you really fit in? Fitting in can be a daunting task. We say we don’t care what other people think about us. Yet we do. We say that we love the way we look but yet we peer into the mirror wondering is it good enough? Is it cute enough? Will someone say something about me?

The older I get, I am truly embracing me. I don’t care what people think of me. I don’t care what people say about me. I’m a little plump…I got the whole saggy boob thing going on. I even have the squishy butt that’s heading in the same direction as my boobs. Yet still I say FUCK IT. Who has more swag than me?

I’m carving out my own image. My own mind set. My own individuality! I’m playing by my own rules. Today I am eating meat. Tomorrow, I will be a vegan all day. The day after, I will be whatever the fuck I want. That’s the lovely thing about life it changes daily. It changes by the minute. It changes by the second.

Carve out your place in life. Be great! Do you! Be happy! Be helpful! Be kind. Fuck it! Be mean if that’s what makes you happy! Just carve out you!

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/carve/

 

Wild Rice Vegetable Soup

I’m trying to expand my palate and make veggies sexy again. LOL! I know. Nothing like a corny ass joke to try to buy time before I express how I really feel.

The soup…second attempt to make a healthy conscious soup that may stick to my bones.

This shit wasn’t it! At least not for me! Wild rice is up on that list with Brussels sprouts. The soup was OK. I would make it again without the wild rice. The recipe called for squash, cannelloni beans, celery, bay leaves, onion, and vegetable stock all in the crock pot. Six hours later…the vegetables were still fucking hard so I left it cooking. 10 hours later…soup! Wild rice and all!

Now out of all people in my damn house, I expected to be in love with the soup and to be the only one to like it. I didn’t expect my husband to like the soup. So…I guess since he liked it I might make it again but maybe with some brown rice.

The final product.

The kale is added last and I added some fresh cracked pepper.

Vegan Black Pepper Tofu

Shocker alert. I have never had tofu before. Never ever!!! So…well…I mean! Well damn! I should just spit it out.

The Vegan Black Pepper Tofu was FIRE! That shit was good.

I was skeptical when I took the tofu out of the package. I wasn’t especially happy about pressing it to take the water out. Feeling the tofu was fucking strange because the texture felt weird. I’m just glad that it didn’t have a smell or this shit would have been dead from the very beginning.

Needless to say, we had another day with eggplant on the menu. Today’s eggplant was pan seared and with the soy sauce concoction that I made gave the eggplant an awesome taste. I can honestly say, I can fuck with eggplant this way versus the eggplant Parmesan that I made yesterday.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I give this dish a 8.5. If all vegan dishes taste this damn good then I’m totally looking forward to my new lifestyle.

I forgot to take a picture of the food on my plate because I fucked it up real quick. But I did capture the prep.

Browning the tofu…

Browned the mushrooms and eggplant…

All together now…

Shit was good…until next time!!!

Eggplant Parm

Another edition of recipes that I’ve tried. I want to become a full time vegan but I can’t be selfish. This was the first time I tried eggplant and veggie spaghetti. Soooo…let’s break this down.

Eggplant is a pain in the ass to prepare. I didn’t know I had to salt it, flatten it to get the water out, etc. After I dried it, I of course wet it back up. Go figure. For a second I felt like I was living in a oxymoron moment. Any who! The eggplant didn’t taste to bad.

The veggie spaghetti started off tasty while it was piping hot but as it cooled so did it’s flavor. Needless to say, I gobbled the shit up quick.

Overall, the meal was good. I would give it a 5 out of 10. I can’t say that it will go into heavy rotation but I will eat this shit again in a month or so after I’m tired of trying new vegan shit. Sadly, I’m having eggplant again tomorrow. Wait to you see this shit I got planned for tomorrow.

If you want the recipe you got to hit me in the comments.